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Wednesday, March 08, 2006
period. ugh.

its not nice. really. thank God you're a guy!(if you are, if not, you share the pain with me)

but i like being a girl. in a way. i just wish i was smarter or more attractive or slimmer. then the attention would be on me. being the "middle" of all the thing mentioned just now is not nice at all.

i wanna be good at something. then people will know, eh, that is Karen the *insert great adjective here*!

i suck at relationships with people. i suck at studying. i suck at being "sociable". i suck at being nice. i suck at public speaking. i suck at writing. i suck at being a good kid. i suck at being an obedient kid.

the list goes on. and on.

i am even stuttering as i talk nowadays. i think its the low self esteem thing coming over me.

owh no. its not good. someone help meeeeeeeeeeeee!:(

< / emo >

i found Mr. Avila's blog. thanx to someone who called him/herself "CIMP Lecturer Fan". omg, CIMP lecturers are superstars, they have fans! hehe.

its weird how he is so different from what i thought he was. i was reading some of his posts.

its weirder that now i am reading his blog. i wonder if he would mind me reading it. but then again, its not like he can block me from reading. hehe. i'm a stalker of blogs. really. i read, but never tell people i read. unless i really know them, then i comment.

oh, i found another ex-CIMPian at HELP! Veron!!! she's from year 2003. just before me. hehe. we were telling Aaron to have Theme Days at ADP. just like the old days! i can't believe i found another CIMPian. we all share the same feeling when it comes to CIMP. hahah. we were like, "it was so fun!:)".

i am supposed to be doing my homepage design and send Aaron some proposal. but i don't feel like it.

all i wanna do is crawl under my comforter and read my book, cry and sleep.

yes, i feel damn i dunno how to put it? depressed? is that a correct word to describe how i feel?
i guess so.

but i can't. i have responsibilities. i have the need to be perfect in every way. but i always fail. so whats the point eh?

owh ya, KarenLee and Hazel's waiting for me services. to make blog layouts for them. i think that would have to wait. im SO not creative right now. i can't even design a homepage. bleh.

but i need something to show James tmr. owhhh craps. business group meeting tmr. shucks. need to read up on oil prices. its 942. i shall stop here and get to work.

no use getting all emo. not good. delay delay.

i wish some anonymous person, not anyone i know personally/internet-ey, would talk to me. i need to tell someone my frustrations.

i need a damn psychologist! maybe i shall try counselling@ HELP..huurrmm....maybe. after all, its free :)

sidney created this smiley for me.

:-.) <-- thats me with a mole on my nose.

hahahhahahahhaa. little things in life that make people happy -quote Lorraine from ADPSC meeting today.

Karen wrote this at.. 3/08/2006 09:25:00 PM
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